"Bad Boys, Bad boys, what you going to do, what you going to do when they come for you." Ok now that you have the theme song to cops in your head lets begin. Oh wait why in the heck to criminals always strip down naked when they are running from the law? Seriously. . . Anyways I have this problem since the age of five of getting busted by the police for being such a criminal.
The first time I was five and my brothers convinced me that it was our neighbors birthday and I should go over to their house and decorated it with toilet paper to surprise them. Of course it's me we are talking about so I joyfully skipped all the way over there and began my beautiful artwork. I'm probably the only weirdo to actually go t-ping in the middle of the day. You can imagine how confused I was when I was being yelled at when the cops showed up--I'm sure my loving brothers probably made the phone call.
Another one of my favorites was when I was in college and we had 8 girls crammed in my car and when the officer asks the infamous "Do you know why I pulled you over"? it was like a confession and each one of my friends chimed in on what they believed to be the reason: She was speeding, not wearing a seat belt, to many people in the car, she didn't stop at the stop sign, and being completely mortified I spazed and said "it's a crime to look this good." Thank goodness he had somewhat of a sense of humor and then said I forgot to turn my blinker on. Umm oh yeah I knew that.
There really are way to many experiences to list after being pulled over last week I think I'm at 34 different cases. OK cuff me. Let me just say that cops are by far my most favorite people in the world. The guns, donuts, the sweet awesome uniforms and their little black flip open notebook--Tough guys.
Now before you go on being haters let me just explain I'm not a blond, I've never pulled out the water works, never bent over the seat to get my purse in the back seat or any of that--I just happen to be really, really, really lucky, and I have gotten a ticket--once. I ran a red light going 15 miles per hour and received and rather attractive picture of me saying "shoot" I swear it was not the other four letter word although it's hard to tell in the photo only to find out at traffic school I shouldn't have been there because there was a problem with the timing of lights and I was going under 20 miles per hour.
I'm not as bad as my little brother who nearly killed Tim and I when he ran a red light going the wrong way down a one way street in front of police station. The police woman--convenient, stated that if the other cars hadn't seen her flashing light they probably would have crashed into us and let him off with a warning, for stupidity I guess.
Plus my husband gets enough tickets for the both of us--he almost even got a ticket for going five over the speed limit when I was in labor--good thing I was in the car.
So here is a shout out to all the Cops--You ROCK!!! Donuts are on me...
*image credit--google images
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