In case you don't know me very well I'm somewhat of a dork and I'm constantly doing silly things to humiliate myself, Although my actions are painfully embarrassing I provide a healthy dose of laughter to all those around me.
The latest dose of medicine. We were swimming at the pool over the weekend and I had brought a box full of ice cream sandwiches for my girls and Rachael's, and I'm going to totally blame this one on the baby--after all that's one thing they are good for, anyways as I was holding her, and being the messy eater that she is, a little piece of chocolate had fallen on my chest. Now something like this never would have happened to me if I wasn't holding a baby. Clearly some of you don't believe me... OK I confess I some times get a little crazy with my food. OK there was this one time I had it in my hair, but I'm getting better I promise.
Tim and I have this little game we play where we have a little competition to see who spills food on themselves first, and the one who can last longer without getting messy wins. I know we have a lot of silly game, but you can't take life to seriously "life's hard and nobody makes it out alive", so have fun.
Back to my story, it's a good one. Here I am talking to this lady from my ward, when I guess this chunk of chocolate chillaxing in my cleavage, (ooh wow look at that alliteration--Big Head would be so proud I'll tell you later) was to much for her husband to bare and he interrupts with, "you have a raisin or something on your chest". Umm thanks I guess. I was so embarrassed. I'm sorry not everyone is blessed with the ability to eat food without decorating their body. It's beautiful artwork, an expression of myself,nobodies perfect.
Don't worry guy I've hired my good old sweet husband to be on cleavage patrol and he will regularly check and inspect for stow aways, and he even offered to provide me with his services free of charge--Awe how sweet.
Umm Eyes up top next time buddy, but thanks for your concern for the welfare of my lady lumps.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Our Fabulous Free Weekend
Still feeling a little discouraged about our financial situation I decided just let it all go and have a a little fun and forget about all my troubles, best part it was free--yeah my favorite.
Thursday: Free movies at the Drive In. I really wanted to take my girls out and have some fun so I was searching online to find something we could all do together and not spend a single penny, and it just happened to be customer appreciation day at the drive ins and they were showing free shows, they had bounce houses for the kids, a band, and my favorite Sumo Wrestling. I was dominating--ok I had my 7 year old as my competition. Just and I was about to knock her out again in round three I'm hit by a bus. Tim tackles me to the ground and everyone is going wild. Sure everyone always cheers for the underdog. We watched bed time stories a very cute movie. It felt great taking work off and having a blast with my family.
Kylee's little head
A little help 
TKO!!!!
Friday: swimming. We meet Rachael and her three girls at the pool and we swam all day. It was a lot colder then the day before but that didn't stop the girls. Kamryn had such a wonderful time in the water. Then Rachael took Kiora and Kylee to stay the night at her house, their first official sleep over. Too bad Tim was at a wedding all day. He brought me home some cake and tossed rose pedals at me and all over the bed. He looked so adorable in his tux.
Saturday: Family Fun. The science center was free and we drove all the was over there but it was so busy we decided to skip it and head straight over to family reunion in Gilbert. That was a lot of fun and great food. Then we made it home just in time to catch the last few minutes of the salsa festival.
Wonderful FREE weekend. I feel so much better. So long bum hum bug.
Thursday: Free movies at the Drive In. I really wanted to take my girls out and have some fun so I was searching online to find something we could all do together and not spend a single penny, and it just happened to be customer appreciation day at the drive ins and they were showing free shows, they had bounce houses for the kids, a band, and my favorite Sumo Wrestling. I was dominating--ok I had my 7 year old as my competition. Just and I was about to knock her out again in round three I'm hit by a bus. Tim tackles me to the ground and everyone is going wild. Sure everyone always cheers for the underdog. We watched bed time stories a very cute movie. It felt great taking work off and having a blast with my family.
Kylee's little head
A little help 
TKO!!!!Friday: swimming. We meet Rachael and her three girls at the pool and we swam all day. It was a lot colder then the day before but that didn't stop the girls. Kamryn had such a wonderful time in the water. Then Rachael took Kiora and Kylee to stay the night at her house, their first official sleep over. Too bad Tim was at a wedding all day. He brought me home some cake and tossed rose pedals at me and all over the bed. He looked so adorable in his tux.
Saturday: Family Fun. The science center was free and we drove all the was over there but it was so busy we decided to skip it and head straight over to family reunion in Gilbert. That was a lot of fun and great food. Then we made it home just in time to catch the last few minutes of the salsa festival.
Wonderful FREE weekend. I feel so much better. So long bum hum bug.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Bummed about being broke.
So I'm some what of an extreme optimist. Let's just say I don't live in what people call reality. I'm usually happy, outgoing,energetic,passionate and excited about ever moment of life, but lately I have been feeling rather down, and a few days ago I was going through my daughters backpack and there was a card she had made me and It brought tears to my eyes, and even days later it still makes me feel a deep hole in my heart. The card said please take me to the book fair and then there was a little wish list of the books she wanted. I've never told anyone this but in December my husband's hours were cut in half and we had to max out all our credit cards, use every penny in our bank account just to keep up with our bills. The last month has been so hard and we have bounce a few of our bills and we literally didn't have any money in the bank and we used our entire 1000 overdraft. I know we are not the only ones going through this and we are very blessed with jobs, a house, and each other, but it broke my heart I wasn't able to take my little girl to book fair. Wow I don't know why I'm getting so emotional about this. It feels good to at least get that out, everyone keeps asking how we are doing and some times I just want to scream we are drowning, save us but of course we smile and say we are great. I know every thing will work out in the end and some how this experience will be a learning experience. I guess it hurts so bad because as a mother I want the very best for my children and of course she doesn't need any more books, but the whole point was having a wonderful bonding experience with my girls at the book fair, and help out their school at the same time. My husband teases me that there is a bum hug bug hiding out in our house--of course he's making fun of me because when he asked me why I was so sad I tried to say ba hum bug but I didn't even come close to that and he laughed at me so hard it made me start laughing and by the end we were both laughing and crying and being complete goofballs as usual. It's really hard to feel crummy when you are laughing so hard you almost wet yourself--go ahead try it. He has a billion little things he teases me about--I love it. I guess growing up with five brothers I was raised on being made fun of and being pick on, so again being the weirdo I am I love being teased. All I know is I never ever want to feel completely helpless and hopeless ever again. Oh I'm going to find that bum hug bug and obliterate him.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Giving Up--Love will always be a mistery
So like I mentioned earlier I've locked myself in the house, gain weight, and tried my best to become unattractive to the opposite sex in hopes that I won't go down in history as a home wrecker. I tried to get help from the guys that I know and they say it's not what I do it's who I am--great I have to become a completely new person.
So before I go changing my whole personality I've decided to wave my white flag and surrender. It's not fair for Tim to come home looking all hunky and here I am with bushy eyebrows, sweat pants, and messy hair. Not to mention I've been miserable not being able to work out afraid of losing the weight I put on. Tim also caught my acting silly when we were out last week at a pizza shop, and I was stuffing my face like a fat cow. There were a bunch of guys smiling and looking at me with that look, so I thought if I shoveled pizza in my mouth, getting sauce every where even in my hair, I would look completely repulsive. When I told Tim that when he brought up the fact that he had never seen me eat like that before in his life he almost died laughing.
He told me I can't hide myself away from the world and even when I tried it didn't work I still have this crazy stalker. He's right. No more. I'm going to be myself again.
And Ladies I just want you to understand, you are all gorgeous and beautiful in your own ways. Even if your boyfriend, husband, or girlfriend--thought I should be politically correct there, look at another woman it doesn't mean they love you any less. Would you like to only look at one beach, one flower, one sunset for the rest of your life? Beauty is every where and it's there for a reason. I hope woman can feel confident and know that they are loved, and sometimes the other woman really is an innocent, sweet little girl, oblivious and naive to the world.
Life's to short to try to run around all day trying to change things or fix things that can't be fixed. Men are biologically attracted to women sorry. In my perfect world there wouldn't be this intense competition and fight for love, there would be one special person for everyone, no affairs, or jealous fits of rage.
So if you have someone go run up to them and let them know that you love them, and women you are amazing! You too guys, I guess.
Can't we all just get a long--Home wreckers included?
So before I go changing my whole personality I've decided to wave my white flag and surrender. It's not fair for Tim to come home looking all hunky and here I am with bushy eyebrows, sweat pants, and messy hair. Not to mention I've been miserable not being able to work out afraid of losing the weight I put on. Tim also caught my acting silly when we were out last week at a pizza shop, and I was stuffing my face like a fat cow. There were a bunch of guys smiling and looking at me with that look, so I thought if I shoveled pizza in my mouth, getting sauce every where even in my hair, I would look completely repulsive. When I told Tim that when he brought up the fact that he had never seen me eat like that before in his life he almost died laughing.
He told me I can't hide myself away from the world and even when I tried it didn't work I still have this crazy stalker. He's right. No more. I'm going to be myself again.
And Ladies I just want you to understand, you are all gorgeous and beautiful in your own ways. Even if your boyfriend, husband, or girlfriend--thought I should be politically correct there, look at another woman it doesn't mean they love you any less. Would you like to only look at one beach, one flower, one sunset for the rest of your life? Beauty is every where and it's there for a reason. I hope woman can feel confident and know that they are loved, and sometimes the other woman really is an innocent, sweet little girl, oblivious and naive to the world.
Life's to short to try to run around all day trying to change things or fix things that can't be fixed. Men are biologically attracted to women sorry. In my perfect world there wouldn't be this intense competition and fight for love, there would be one special person for everyone, no affairs, or jealous fits of rage.
So if you have someone go run up to them and let them know that you love them, and women you are amazing! You too guys, I guess.
Can't we all just get a long--Home wreckers included?
I Don't Know You but I Think I Love You.
Do you believe in love at first sight? or should I walk by again. . . I love that joke. I don't know if I believe at love at first sight. I think attraction is very important in a relationship. I was always trying to convince myself that I wasn't in love--we were just friends, that by the time my heart finally overcame my head I had seen Tim a hundred times or more. Oh what the heck I'm a hopeless romantic I guess there could be love at first sight, but you should still get to know each other for goodness sakes......
A few of my early heart breaker moments and surely not my last.
Tony the Homeless man my brother-in-law adopted. I was 15 or 16 and I was spending my summer vacation watching my baby niece for my sister. I always did love babies. Here was this creepy guy living on my sister's couch who somehow with in two weeks was convinced he was madly in love with me and wanted to marry me. He thought I was the most beautiful and intellectually stimulating young girl he had ever met. He even quit his job so he could spend all day with me. He started to get really creepy. I would have to lock myself in the bedroom until Bill came home. He kept touching me. I told the poor guy that he made me sick and that I didn't like him at all, and that I had a boyfriend--which some how the week before this guy named Andy I was chatting with online thought we were an item so technically it wasn't a lie. The poor guy didn't even get my brutal honesty and brought me pepto bismal thinking that would help with the sickness. Finally enough was enough and I called my sister to let her know that there was a homeless guy living in her house, and my dad had called and Tony had answered the phone and said that I couldn't come to the phone so he was on his way to pick me up that day and have my brother watch my niece instead. Bill got a severe verbal beat down, and every time I look at pepto I think of this stupid guy who didn't understand what it meant to be repulsive.
Chatting Chaos My problems weren't over remember I told you about Andy the guy I was chatting with so I wouldn't have to talk to Tony? Well after about a month of chatting he mailed me a ring, was going to change his religion for me, and flew down to meet me. I of course had gotten myself in another bind and had to break yet another heart. I told him you can't fall in love with someone you have never physically met--apparently I was wrong just look at all of the online dating services now, and I just found out a few months again that my brother met his wife online.
Awe office love.. So I get another job and start working with this guy I will call him Zack--I always like that name and used to think the guy off of save by the bell named Zack was a hottie. So Zack only worked with me a few time but again quickly this guy thought he was in love. I even re-arranged my schedule so I wouldn't have to work with him and he knew I was dating Tim--I think they were even on the basketball team together, and he would call me when he knew Tim was gone and ask me out. He started talking about marriage--very creepy. Finally my sister-n-law yelled at him to leave me a lone that I was in love with Tim and that we were going to get married. Hmmm I hadn't thought of marriage--I had my dream become a model, travel the world, become a Doctor and then after that get married around 28. I'm not even 28 yet. It's funny how what you think you want isn't really what you what after all. I have about a dozen more stories about the office romance. Maybe I have and over production of pheromones because honestly there are way more gorgeous women out there guys, single ones too.
Loan Advisor Lost. We were trying to buy our first house so I open up a phone book and call the first loan company I found. Diego pick up the phone and we started down the path of home ownership and more than a home warming gift. Again I talked to Diego several times on the phone, through emails, he stopped by the house , we went out to lunch, and I was thinking this was normal, buying a house is a very emotional and complicated process, and this guy really wants his commission. Then one day I get this rather odd phone call of him stating that he thinks his wife is on to him and that we needed to cool down and something about he wanted an affair but his wife would find out. Wait, what did I miss here. I quickly called Tim and told him I hated the city and I wanted to go home and a couple of months later me moved back to Pima. Without the help of this guy.
Home wrecker We moved backed to Gilbert and there was a nice couple and the guy was extremely friendly. We talked a few time really about nothing you know small talk but then he kept standing to close to me accidentally finding ways to bump me or touch me, and then I caught him taking pictures of me with his cell phone--this freak me out I gave him a nasty look then ran over to Tim and told him the whole thing hoping he would beat him up I guess. The guy came over and said he was sorry and made up some story of why he was taking pictures of me. I almost believed him. Then roomers got out about him and his wife getting a divorce and she said something I guess has kind of stuck with me. She told me that I wasn't the only reason they were getting a divorce. Of course I developed the new nick name home wrecker and we all had several laughs about it, and we moved yet again.
I guess that last experience really got to me and I've become a complete shut in. Luckily I work from home and with mostly women. I try to make myself unattractive, no makeup, hair in the pony tale, sweat pant, I've gain 10 pounds. I thought I was safe, but no even as a shut-in, frumpy house wife, I still managed to once again go on my heart braking ways when my daughter sabotaged me and open the door while I was working out in a bikini. I don't even wear bikini's in front of Tim. I tried to make a break for my room but the damage was done and I now have a creepy stalker.
I'm hoping Tim will let us move one more time, but with countless experiences like these there has to be something wrong with me. Even locking myself inside didn't help. Now I fear for my poor daughters who have little boys falling all over them.
Ladies lock up your boys.
A few of my early heart breaker moments and surely not my last.
Tony the Homeless man my brother-in-law adopted. I was 15 or 16 and I was spending my summer vacation watching my baby niece for my sister. I always did love babies. Here was this creepy guy living on my sister's couch who somehow with in two weeks was convinced he was madly in love with me and wanted to marry me. He thought I was the most beautiful and intellectually stimulating young girl he had ever met. He even quit his job so he could spend all day with me. He started to get really creepy. I would have to lock myself in the bedroom until Bill came home. He kept touching me. I told the poor guy that he made me sick and that I didn't like him at all, and that I had a boyfriend--which some how the week before this guy named Andy I was chatting with online thought we were an item so technically it wasn't a lie. The poor guy didn't even get my brutal honesty and brought me pepto bismal thinking that would help with the sickness. Finally enough was enough and I called my sister to let her know that there was a homeless guy living in her house, and my dad had called and Tony had answered the phone and said that I couldn't come to the phone so he was on his way to pick me up that day and have my brother watch my niece instead. Bill got a severe verbal beat down, and every time I look at pepto I think of this stupid guy who didn't understand what it meant to be repulsive.
Chatting Chaos My problems weren't over remember I told you about Andy the guy I was chatting with so I wouldn't have to talk to Tony? Well after about a month of chatting he mailed me a ring, was going to change his religion for me, and flew down to meet me. I of course had gotten myself in another bind and had to break yet another heart. I told him you can't fall in love with someone you have never physically met--apparently I was wrong just look at all of the online dating services now, and I just found out a few months again that my brother met his wife online.
Awe office love.. So I get another job and start working with this guy I will call him Zack--I always like that name and used to think the guy off of save by the bell named Zack was a hottie. So Zack only worked with me a few time but again quickly this guy thought he was in love. I even re-arranged my schedule so I wouldn't have to work with him and he knew I was dating Tim--I think they were even on the basketball team together, and he would call me when he knew Tim was gone and ask me out. He started talking about marriage--very creepy. Finally my sister-n-law yelled at him to leave me a lone that I was in love with Tim and that we were going to get married. Hmmm I hadn't thought of marriage--I had my dream become a model, travel the world, become a Doctor and then after that get married around 28. I'm not even 28 yet. It's funny how what you think you want isn't really what you what after all. I have about a dozen more stories about the office romance. Maybe I have and over production of pheromones because honestly there are way more gorgeous women out there guys, single ones too.
Loan Advisor Lost. We were trying to buy our first house so I open up a phone book and call the first loan company I found. Diego pick up the phone and we started down the path of home ownership and more than a home warming gift. Again I talked to Diego several times on the phone, through emails, he stopped by the house , we went out to lunch, and I was thinking this was normal, buying a house is a very emotional and complicated process, and this guy really wants his commission. Then one day I get this rather odd phone call of him stating that he thinks his wife is on to him and that we needed to cool down and something about he wanted an affair but his wife would find out. Wait, what did I miss here. I quickly called Tim and told him I hated the city and I wanted to go home and a couple of months later me moved back to Pima. Without the help of this guy.
Home wrecker We moved backed to Gilbert and there was a nice couple and the guy was extremely friendly. We talked a few time really about nothing you know small talk but then he kept standing to close to me accidentally finding ways to bump me or touch me, and then I caught him taking pictures of me with his cell phone--this freak me out I gave him a nasty look then ran over to Tim and told him the whole thing hoping he would beat him up I guess. The guy came over and said he was sorry and made up some story of why he was taking pictures of me. I almost believed him. Then roomers got out about him and his wife getting a divorce and she said something I guess has kind of stuck with me. She told me that I wasn't the only reason they were getting a divorce. Of course I developed the new nick name home wrecker and we all had several laughs about it, and we moved yet again.
I guess that last experience really got to me and I've become a complete shut in. Luckily I work from home and with mostly women. I try to make myself unattractive, no makeup, hair in the pony tale, sweat pant, I've gain 10 pounds. I thought I was safe, but no even as a shut-in, frumpy house wife, I still managed to once again go on my heart braking ways when my daughter sabotaged me and open the door while I was working out in a bikini. I don't even wear bikini's in front of Tim. I tried to make a break for my room but the damage was done and I now have a creepy stalker.
I'm hoping Tim will let us move one more time, but with countless experiences like these there has to be something wrong with me. Even locking myself inside didn't help. Now I fear for my poor daughters who have little boys falling all over them.
Ladies lock up your boys.
She was Jessies Girl--best friends love maddness.
There's is this cheesy song from the 80's where this guy falls in love with his best friends girlfriend some of the lyrics are "Why can't I find a woman like that. . . . She was Jessie girl" Anyways I thought it was kinda funny because Tim's best friend was named Jessie and all of his girlfriends always fell in love with Tim. OK that isn't funny at all.
Again with the crazy world we live in where when you love someone, but they don't love you back, or you think you're in love only to find you don't know what love is, or you fall head over heals for someone who is taken. Am I the only one who thinks there's a problem here?
So one of the biggest heart breaker is woman are like m&ms, you can never just have one, and I guess vice verse as well. I wouldn't mind a few more men--one to go to work all day, one to cook and clean, one to tend the kids while I had some free time with Tim. How is this a bad idea--only teasing I know it's illegal, but if it wasn't. . . I guess my sister-n-law has found a way to work the system she's been divorce several times so she get child support and someone to take the kids away for the weekend that's kind of the same thing.
Anyways Jill (not her real name), who I mentioned earlier, was my best friend, moved away and morphs into a monster and here are a few of our not so happy times together and my frustrations with the opposite sex.
Jill calls, begging my to drive three hours to see her, she's needs me, and being the sweet awesome friend that I am, of course I make the journey to the rescue. She tells me that she's fighting with her boyfriend, but they made up and now I get a front row seat of them getting back together-- wonderful. Again guys you should kiss with your eyes closed and focus on one woman at a time. So for the week I'm a third wheel and Darrin, Jill's boyfriend makes the mistake of being to friendly and trying to hard to impress the best friend.
Guys while it is very important to empress the best friend be careful not to go overboard. I hope you are taking notes.
Anyways Darrin makes the mistake of slipping out that I had a cute, adorable butt in front of Jill. Now having been a dancer my whole life I did kinda have a cute butt, and it was written in all the history books at school, so it must have been true. (Joe I know it was you who wrote that in all the books, and you will pay some day.) After realize what he said he tried to make it better, but he crashed and burned big time.
Jill told him to go home and we had a heart to heart talk, where she basically blame me for all her problems and said it was horrible being my friend because she always felt invisible next to me and even when she moved hundreds of miles away to be her own person her boyfriend liked me better. Jill was gorgeous, and I in no way came close to her beauty, I knew right away that I better have a rocking personality because I wasn't going to get by on just my looks. Even Tim thought she was gorgeous, so I knew how horrible it must have felt to have your boyfriend be attracted to your friend.
AWE. . . go run and get the tissues.
I guess something snapped in her and here we were calling up Garrett and going out with another guy who had a girlfriend. Hmmm I never pictured Jill as a two timing back stabber.
Oh it gets better. Apparently she's become a stripper as well and Jill drags me a long to watch her take her clothes off from several guys all who have girlfriends, so I go find a room to try to get a way from this real life porno and here is this Garrett guy in nothing but his underwear, throws me on the bed locks the bedroom door, and has a pocket knife to me trying to rape me while I'm scream for help. Finally his roommate bust opens the door and when I ask Jill why she didn't do anything she says "I thought you two wanted to be a lone".
Grrrr. Oh being raped is what I came down here for I didn't know that. Can you tell we aren't friends anymore?
I demand Jill take me back to her house and Garrett comes along but we made a few stops along the way. First we stop at his girlfriends house who is completely beaten up, black eyes, cut up face, broken arm. Garrett had wrecked his car with her in it and he came out fine. Here he was kissing her while just moments again he was making out with Jill and trying to rape me.
It's getting late but there is another stop in a deserted field were Garrett continues trying to make out with me. When I tell him I have a boyfriend he and Jill chime in together saying "so. . . we do too"
Question? Is it really that hard to be committed to only one person?
Hours go on of me stranded trying to escape these two hormonal monsters when Jill--mind you my best friend since Kindergarten asks me to make out with her.
I get out of the car and try to find a way home. They finally agree to take me home as as Garrett open the door for me--smooth, so romantic, not. He grabs me a kisses me.
I honestly am in complete shock and how Jill has changed. I still tried to be her friend even through college, she was even my maid of honor, but things only got worse from here.
Thankfully I had a cousin who lived close and I called her to come pick me up. Ironically she's dating one of Darrin's friends and guess who comes a long with us to the movies?
Let's just say Darrin knew something was wrong when I wouldn't tell him where Jill and I were the night before.
Cheaters always get caught one way or another. And even if you don't you can be such a better person than that.
Again with the crazy world we live in where when you love someone, but they don't love you back, or you think you're in love only to find you don't know what love is, or you fall head over heals for someone who is taken. Am I the only one who thinks there's a problem here?
So one of the biggest heart breaker is woman are like m&ms, you can never just have one, and I guess vice verse as well. I wouldn't mind a few more men--one to go to work all day, one to cook and clean, one to tend the kids while I had some free time with Tim. How is this a bad idea--only teasing I know it's illegal, but if it wasn't. . . I guess my sister-n-law has found a way to work the system she's been divorce several times so she get child support and someone to take the kids away for the weekend that's kind of the same thing.
Anyways Jill (not her real name), who I mentioned earlier, was my best friend, moved away and morphs into a monster and here are a few of our not so happy times together and my frustrations with the opposite sex.
Jill calls, begging my to drive three hours to see her, she's needs me, and being the sweet awesome friend that I am, of course I make the journey to the rescue. She tells me that she's fighting with her boyfriend, but they made up and now I get a front row seat of them getting back together-- wonderful. Again guys you should kiss with your eyes closed and focus on one woman at a time. So for the week I'm a third wheel and Darrin, Jill's boyfriend makes the mistake of being to friendly and trying to hard to impress the best friend.
Guys while it is very important to empress the best friend be careful not to go overboard. I hope you are taking notes.
Anyways Darrin makes the mistake of slipping out that I had a cute, adorable butt in front of Jill. Now having been a dancer my whole life I did kinda have a cute butt, and it was written in all the history books at school, so it must have been true. (Joe I know it was you who wrote that in all the books, and you will pay some day.) After realize what he said he tried to make it better, but he crashed and burned big time.
Jill told him to go home and we had a heart to heart talk, where she basically blame me for all her problems and said it was horrible being my friend because she always felt invisible next to me and even when she moved hundreds of miles away to be her own person her boyfriend liked me better. Jill was gorgeous, and I in no way came close to her beauty, I knew right away that I better have a rocking personality because I wasn't going to get by on just my looks. Even Tim thought she was gorgeous, so I knew how horrible it must have felt to have your boyfriend be attracted to your friend.
AWE. . . go run and get the tissues.
I guess something snapped in her and here we were calling up Garrett and going out with another guy who had a girlfriend. Hmmm I never pictured Jill as a two timing back stabber.
Oh it gets better. Apparently she's become a stripper as well and Jill drags me a long to watch her take her clothes off from several guys all who have girlfriends, so I go find a room to try to get a way from this real life porno and here is this Garrett guy in nothing but his underwear, throws me on the bed locks the bedroom door, and has a pocket knife to me trying to rape me while I'm scream for help. Finally his roommate bust opens the door and when I ask Jill why she didn't do anything she says "I thought you two wanted to be a lone".
Grrrr. Oh being raped is what I came down here for I didn't know that. Can you tell we aren't friends anymore?
I demand Jill take me back to her house and Garrett comes along but we made a few stops along the way. First we stop at his girlfriends house who is completely beaten up, black eyes, cut up face, broken arm. Garrett had wrecked his car with her in it and he came out fine. Here he was kissing her while just moments again he was making out with Jill and trying to rape me.
It's getting late but there is another stop in a deserted field were Garrett continues trying to make out with me. When I tell him I have a boyfriend he and Jill chime in together saying "so. . . we do too"
Question? Is it really that hard to be committed to only one person?
Hours go on of me stranded trying to escape these two hormonal monsters when Jill--mind you my best friend since Kindergarten asks me to make out with her.
I get out of the car and try to find a way home. They finally agree to take me home as as Garrett open the door for me--smooth, so romantic, not. He grabs me a kisses me.
I honestly am in complete shock and how Jill has changed. I still tried to be her friend even through college, she was even my maid of honor, but things only got worse from here.
Thankfully I had a cousin who lived close and I called her to come pick me up. Ironically she's dating one of Darrin's friends and guess who comes a long with us to the movies?
Let's just say Darrin knew something was wrong when I wouldn't tell him where Jill and I were the night before.
Cheaters always get caught one way or another. And even if you don't you can be such a better person than that.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
My First Love
My first love: I was in love with my brother's best friend--an unspoken no no. We hung out together he made me laugh, made me sick to my stomach, heart pound, hands sweat, you know the usually things that happen when you are in love.
My first fight with my best friend Cami was over him because I was spending more time with him than her, not to mention my brother wasn't very happy I was stealling all his friends away, those where his exact words.
For years we played these stupid mind games with each other, yet nothing ever happen, well there were a few funny moments of things supposedly happening, like when we both stayed up all night playing video games and falling asleep together on the airbed, or when my mom flipped out when she went into my room and saw these ginormous feet hanging off of my bed and demanded to know who was in my bed to that I replied the Easter bunny--I didn't know what she was talking about because I had stayed at a friends house and my bother told this guy he could sleep in my bed and I had just got home five minutes prior--my poor mom, and then when I accidentally stripped him when we were playing tackle football in my back yard, my bad, oh and my favorite our almost first kiss, honestly it would have been one heck of a kiss it was so romantic--It didn't happen I'll just leave it at that and spare you the details.
Years and years of this I like you, you like me, lets just be friends, I hate you, but I'm just saying that so no one will know that I secretly love you, even though it's obvious to everyone--lost yet I'm telling you I'm still trying to figure it out.
So getting totally frustrated by having this guy tell everyone how amazing I was one day and making out with his girlfriend right in front of me while watching me to make sure I'm watching, the next. STOP
Question # 1 Guys why do you make out with your ladies in front of me while looking at me. Stop it's nasty. This happens to me a lot. You should kiss with your eyes shut and somethings are better left in the bedroom. Plus If you are trying to make us jealous ignore us and be completely devoted and focus on your woman. I know this might be near impossible for some, but we would like a guy who's so in love with us and not even Britni Spears walking around in a thong making out with Madonna could distract them from our beauty, and their passion for us. Enough said, just stop it!
So I was getting sick of this player and sadly I stopped being his friend and I wouldn't even speak to him, but you can't choose who you love and I guess even though he was a complete jerk I still like him--yuck
Question #2 Why do women like the bad boys and no matter how horrible and sleazy men could be even to the point of being abusive some women still come crawling back. Just something to think about.
So What I did next I'm not exactly proud of but I did find my one true love in the end, so I am glad I had a weak moment and I was really immature. Heck all is fair in love in war. I met Tim who was dating this girl who thought she was my best friend--long story, the night before on a double date and he happened to be at the fair without his girlfriend that night, and even though I didn't know him I had asked him for a tiny little favor. Your going to laugh at how retarded I was, but I told him that there was this guy who always mack tens his girlfriend in front of me and he makes my blood boil and I just want to give him a taste of his own medicine so I asked Tim if he could help me make him jealous. The sweetie agree although what I had in mind was a lot different than what really happened but he had a girlfriend--see guys being devoted to your girlfriend pays off, so he didn't do much except stand in proximity of me and win me a few stuffed animals, none the less it worked like magic. Here this jerk was at my window at 2 am asking me "what does this guy have that I don't." And telling me it was always me who he wanted to be with, and we belong together bla bla bla.
My first fight with my best friend Cami was over him because I was spending more time with him than her, not to mention my brother wasn't very happy I was stealling all his friends away, those where his exact words.
For years we played these stupid mind games with each other, yet nothing ever happen, well there were a few funny moments of things supposedly happening, like when we both stayed up all night playing video games and falling asleep together on the airbed, or when my mom flipped out when she went into my room and saw these ginormous feet hanging off of my bed and demanded to know who was in my bed to that I replied the Easter bunny--I didn't know what she was talking about because I had stayed at a friends house and my bother told this guy he could sleep in my bed and I had just got home five minutes prior--my poor mom, and then when I accidentally stripped him when we were playing tackle football in my back yard, my bad, oh and my favorite our almost first kiss, honestly it would have been one heck of a kiss it was so romantic--It didn't happen I'll just leave it at that and spare you the details.
Years and years of this I like you, you like me, lets just be friends, I hate you, but I'm just saying that so no one will know that I secretly love you, even though it's obvious to everyone--lost yet I'm telling you I'm still trying to figure it out.
So getting totally frustrated by having this guy tell everyone how amazing I was one day and making out with his girlfriend right in front of me while watching me to make sure I'm watching, the next. STOP
Question # 1 Guys why do you make out with your ladies in front of me while looking at me. Stop it's nasty. This happens to me a lot. You should kiss with your eyes shut and somethings are better left in the bedroom. Plus If you are trying to make us jealous ignore us and be completely devoted and focus on your woman. I know this might be near impossible for some, but we would like a guy who's so in love with us and not even Britni Spears walking around in a thong making out with Madonna could distract them from our beauty, and their passion for us. Enough said, just stop it!
So I was getting sick of this player and sadly I stopped being his friend and I wouldn't even speak to him, but you can't choose who you love and I guess even though he was a complete jerk I still like him--yuck
Question #2 Why do women like the bad boys and no matter how horrible and sleazy men could be even to the point of being abusive some women still come crawling back. Just something to think about.
So What I did next I'm not exactly proud of but I did find my one true love in the end, so I am glad I had a weak moment and I was really immature. Heck all is fair in love in war. I met Tim who was dating this girl who thought she was my best friend--long story, the night before on a double date and he happened to be at the fair without his girlfriend that night, and even though I didn't know him I had asked him for a tiny little favor. Your going to laugh at how retarded I was, but I told him that there was this guy who always mack tens his girlfriend in front of me and he makes my blood boil and I just want to give him a taste of his own medicine so I asked Tim if he could help me make him jealous. The sweetie agree although what I had in mind was a lot different than what really happened but he had a girlfriend--see guys being devoted to your girlfriend pays off, so he didn't do much except stand in proximity of me and win me a few stuffed animals, none the less it worked like magic. Here this jerk was at my window at 2 am asking me "what does this guy have that I don't." And telling me it was always me who he wanted to be with, and we belong together bla bla bla.
Question #3 Why do guys always want what they can't have.
Unfortunately poor Tim fell madly in love with me, can you blame him--only teasing. He got my number from his girlfriend, dumped the witch, and the rest is history.
A little side note on that one--girls are not the only nimrods that keep going back to a horrible relationship--Tim kept taking this witch back over and over and over again even though she was cheating on him with over 7 different guys, just in case you were thinking she was a victim in this love battle. The reason he was at the fair a lone is because she stood him up that night to be with the guy she set me up on a blind date the night before. Sleazy--not that using another girls boyfriend to make you first crush jealous is any better. High School that's all I got to say.
Now years later here I was with this gorgeous, successful, passionate, perfect man and I run into my first love working at an icee shop. He sees me and locks himself in the closet. I had to wait fifteen minutes until another worker comes to help me. He tried to open the closet door but it was lock and he thought that was kinda weird and asked me if I saw anyone go in there. Ah poor thing. I hope he OK and I really to wish him the best.
In my perfect world everyone would be as lucky in love as me--only fall in love with their one true love, and live happily ever after--no heart aches.
You can't die of embarrassment can you?
Home wrecker and the endless search for a platonic friendship
The strangest thing happened in church Sunday that made me start to think about how messed up the relationships between men and women are, and how I've almost given up complete hope that a platonic friendship could exist.
So back to my story: On Sunday I was sitting by this lady, well two chairs away, no one ever wants to sit next to me, but that's a different story, and she introduced herself as though she was at an AA meeting, " Hi my name is so and so and I haven't been to church for over five years but I had a feeling I needed to be here today". Just before the end of the lesson she said she had a comment and then told us that she was abused and when she got a divorce everyone was saying that she was trying to steal their husbands and that is why she stop going to church. Everyone started whispering and rolling their eyes, and honestly I don't know how her comment was relevant to what we were talking about, but it was rather entertaining to see every ones reaction to her, and then another divorcee said that she had a similar experience and reassure everyone that she didn't want any of our husbands--obviously she hasn't met mine yet only teasing.
Afterwards I started to think about all my past experiences, and how the relationships between men and women are so messed up. I will sharing a few of my experience with bizarre experiences with the opposite sex in hopes to gets some answers to life's toughest questions,
and I would love to hear some of your experiences as well or your suggestions to help me not be such a heart breaker and home wrecker.
So back to my story: On Sunday I was sitting by this lady, well two chairs away, no one ever wants to sit next to me, but that's a different story, and she introduced herself as though she was at an AA meeting, " Hi my name is so and so and I haven't been to church for over five years but I had a feeling I needed to be here today". Just before the end of the lesson she said she had a comment and then told us that she was abused and when she got a divorce everyone was saying that she was trying to steal their husbands and that is why she stop going to church. Everyone started whispering and rolling their eyes, and honestly I don't know how her comment was relevant to what we were talking about, but it was rather entertaining to see every ones reaction to her, and then another divorcee said that she had a similar experience and reassure everyone that she didn't want any of our husbands--obviously she hasn't met mine yet only teasing.
Afterwards I started to think about all my past experiences, and how the relationships between men and women are so messed up. I will sharing a few of my experience with bizarre experiences with the opposite sex in hopes to gets some answers to life's toughest questions,
and I would love to hear some of your experiences as well or your suggestions to help me not be such a heart breaker and home wrecker.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Procrastinator Princess
I am the biggest procrastinator in the world! It almost has a super hero ring to it--THE PROCRASTINATOR. Watch out Governor Arnold, "I'll be Back". . . tomorrow.
So it's no surprise that I just filed my taxes the day they were due. I honestly believe I must have been born with this sickness. As long as I can remember I was always putting things off till the last minute. Every report was done the morning it was due, even when I was asked to speak in public I would prepare my speech five to ten minutes before.
I never understood the stupid saying "A stitch in time saves nine"-- hello that's why they invented sewing machines.
So now I'm hosting a party for a bunch of six year old tomorrow and I don't have anything yet, no party favors, ice cream, cake, decorations, and my house is a disaster. I still have to shampoo the carpets, and furniture, I basically have to clean every room and surface in my house every second of the day to keep it clean because I live with a three little messy monkeys--OK four Tim's a little messy too : ) only teasing.
I love the adrenalin rush of having to beat the clock, and I need the stress to get me motivated, I'm sure every procrastinator has there share of excuses. I'm sure it will be perfect and wonderful it always turns out in the end, but I think I'm getting to old for this. I might even try to be normal and get things done at least the day before, baby steps people I'm not a super hero or am I?
So it's no surprise that I just filed my taxes the day they were due. I honestly believe I must have been born with this sickness. As long as I can remember I was always putting things off till the last minute. Every report was done the morning it was due, even when I was asked to speak in public I would prepare my speech five to ten minutes before.
I never understood the stupid saying "A stitch in time saves nine"-- hello that's why they invented sewing machines.
So now I'm hosting a party for a bunch of six year old tomorrow and I don't have anything yet, no party favors, ice cream, cake, decorations, and my house is a disaster. I still have to shampoo the carpets, and furniture, I basically have to clean every room and surface in my house every second of the day to keep it clean because I live with a three little messy monkeys--OK four Tim's a little messy too : ) only teasing.
I love the adrenalin rush of having to beat the clock, and I need the stress to get me motivated, I'm sure every procrastinator has there share of excuses. I'm sure it will be perfect and wonderful it always turns out in the end, but I think I'm getting to old for this. I might even try to be normal and get things done at least the day before, baby steps people I'm not a super hero or am I?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)